Slant Rhyme!

Creativity is fine, time is mine
But they say you won't shine

Work is there, balance is where
And they tell its just a layer

Life is good, things are many
But they say save some penny

Friends are gay, black is grey
And they tell not THE way

Smiles flow, relationship mends
But they say wait till this ends

Love galore, rock and roll
I say lets fuck it all!
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One of those ironies of India

Only in India where 
multi-millionaires siphon off moolah from poor but a building guard lends you his money to pay your rickshaw bill


Only in India where 
you can kill and roam freely but keeping more than 2 litres of liquor at your home can get you jailed

Only in India where
a Cornell educated, 28 years old has never cast vote but her illiterate maid has never missed one

Only in India where 
infidelity is evil but Lord Krishna is being worshipped

Only in India where 
talking about gay rights is a crime but its father of nation is a bi

Only in India where 
condoms are unheard of but homosexuality can be treated by drinking water

Only in India where 
majority can't buy a handful of food-grains but everyone knows about the tariff schemes of Tata Docomo


Only in India where 
life does not have a rhythm but everyone sings and dances to the tunes in their heads!

10 things I wish I knew when I was 18!

1. Peace, respect and dignity are not directly proportional to great education. The equation is reverse.  Great education won’t take me to places; rather it would just make me stronger to take piss from my boss.
2. There is no such thing as I-won’t-get-fat; wrong (eating) habits would certainly make me fat one day.
3. I won’t invent any cool gadget in my career; I would just be content using other great men’s discoveries.
4. I will never own a private jet. I would just fly economy class all my life and be happy about it.
5. Spending money would be as tough as earning it.
6. People do care a shit about how one carries oneself. They most definitely judge others.
7. I would never be able to see all the exotic places in the world. Heck, seeing all the places in India is a remote possibility.
8. There are several things which are impossible. Quitting one’s job tops that list.
9. Patience is really a virtue, and I won’t acquire it just like that (read when I turn 25). 
10. The concept of arranged marriages would not become obsolete for our generation.  It is here to stay for innumerable years!

Growing Old is Mandatory; Growing Up is Optional...!

You know you are growing old when you start using a cork opener to open a tender cocunut.

You know you are growing old when reaching home early amounts to finishing off your laundry!

You know you are growing old when you start checking your official mails first thing on a Sunday morning.

You know you are growing old when you start adding friends' birthday reminders in your outlook calendar.

You know you are growing old when your mood spoils terribly if the maid is on leave.

You know you are growing old when you plan the number of drinks you would have before going to a party.

You know you are growing old when your white/grey tresses don't bother you. Rather, you show it to your friends.

You know you are growing old when your back hurts if you sleep on a couch.

You know you are growing old when the balance in your Savings Account is never too low.

You know you are growing old when your wallet has a loyalty card of Big Bazaar and Reliance Fresh!

You know you are growing old when you charge your cellphones every night without fail.

You know you are growing old when you start planning your day while crapping in the morning.

You know you are growing old when you can't make it to the Ice Lounge even if you bought the coupons a month back.

You know you are growing old when your imminent 28th birthday reminds you of the 'Big 3 O'!

Well, I wonder if I am growing old or growing up?!

Get ready!

Since I was a small girl, my parents used to tell me every single morning to get “ready”; now all my relatives and friends are saying the same. The only difference is they meant getting ready for going to the school, others mean getting ready for marriage. My marriage..and that too an arranged one!! Things could not be scarier.

But, apparently I have not changed a bit in all these days. I still hate this saddest word in the English language as much as I used to hate it 20 years back. No, I am not ready for anything in life; least of all marriage! How can I possibly be ready for something which is so new, so different and so unpredictable?

I am a person of habits and the slightest amount of change disturbs me.  The change from being Miss to being Mrs., the change from being called didi to being called bhabhi, the change from being free to being married is surely gonna be one hell of a change. How can they expect me to be ready for it? What’s with the world?

I am not saying that I don’t believe in the institution of marriage. I do but till now it was someone else’s institution.  I had heard about it, read about it, witnessed it but I was never ready for it. I was a mere spectator.  Now, I am at the center stage.

I have this fear that very soon life will change forever. And change it will! Will that change be good? Well, I don’t know.

But, I have a plan of action. I would do everything I ever wanted to do in life.  I would go for a road trip covering the length and breadth of the country; I would spend one whole night at a beach; I would run the full marathon (on second thoughts, maybe a half marathon..heck, whatever); I would eat junk food one full night without feeling guilty; I would learn bartending, I would get a portrait done of myself..and possibly go to Vegas!

So, at some level am I getting ready? Well, yeah, maybe unknowingly I am.

Source : Zindagi na milegi doobara..

Jab jab dard ka baadal chaya 
Jab ghum ka saya lehraya 
Jab aansoo palkon tak aya 
Jab yeh tanha dil ghabraya 
Humne dil ko yeh samjhaya 
Dil aakhir tu kyun rota hai 
Duniya mein yunhi hota hai  


Yeh jo gehre sannaate hain 
Waqt ne sabko hi baante hain 
Thoda ghum hai sabka qissa 
Thodi dhoop hai sabka hissa 
Aankh teri bekaar hi namm hai 
Har pal ek naya mausam hai 
Kyun tu aise pal khota hai 
Dil aakhir tu kyun rota hai 

"The" blackberry craze!

Supposedly, the basic function of a phone is to make and receive calls.  And, that is exactly what I don’t do with my blackberry (read ‘little devil’). I hate to receive calls. But the moment the tiny little thing on my cell blinks (for all technical discussion, I would call it as panic button), I have to compulsively see why it is blinking. If there is a disease called as blackberry mania, I think I am its worst sufferer. 

It all started very gradually. I still remember the day my dad bought me the little devil. I was in absolute love with it, but did not even bother to get the much talked about blackberry services activated on it.  As I am not too fond of receiving calls, the little devil pretty much used to work under my command. I used to pick it up only when I had to make calls. Life was good! I used to sleep peacefully. Aah, the little pleasures of life!

 And then came the fateful day! I was cajoled to get the blackberry services activated on the devil. I succumbed to the peer pressure and bam, one fine day I got them activated. I configured my personal and official mail on it, downloaded Google talk and started adding friends on the “BBM”. Little did I know then that my life was about to change for good. It was almost like a love affair. I was practically hooked to the devil almost through the day and started spending my nights with it. But, I was sure that my infatuation would end in a couple of months.  The lust does not last longer than that, isn’t it? I did not know I was so wrong.

As days passed by, I was all the more attracted to it. I started carrying it everywhere I used to go. My morning regime of reading newspaper in the loo went for a toss.  Knowing fully well that my little devil cannot withstand water, still I could not resist the temptation of carrying it to the bathroom.  My devil started accompanying me to office’s meetings, friends’ places, pubs..every place I can possibly think of.  And, it did not end there. I developed the obsession of replying back to every ping, mail and pin! I was extremely well connected with all my acquaintances and my real friends started drifting apart. But, I could not care less. I had my angel (oops devil) with me. I could not keep my hands and eyes off my devil. I was so glued to it. I stopped wearing those trousers which did not have pockets. I was so possessive of it; I did not want any distance between us. By now, I was completely sure that I could not think of a life without it. I was still very happy.

But of late, this devil has started bossing me around. Now, I am extremely captivated by it. My fingers hurt but I can’t stop typing. I have to look at the panic button after every 2 minutes to see if my devil is calling me.  Even if my boss is sitting right across the table, I can’t stop myself from taking orders from my real master.  Almost every night, I get up from my peaceful sleep just for a glimpse of my devil.

Now that the things are completely out of my control, I have started practicing celibacy. I keep the devil away from my sight and make promises with my soul that I won’t touch it for next 15 minutes. But, I fail miserably.  It rules my brain, eyes, hands and soul.

For the love of the Lord, someone please treat my mania!